Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
