Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I need a beard to bite.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
