hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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