No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
