is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
