it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Porn is love you can see.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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