im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Randomize
