Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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