but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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