oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Randomize
