We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
