Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
