We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
