she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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