Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
