what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
