awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
