I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
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