They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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