i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
