ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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