Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
