Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
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