It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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