As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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