The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Randomize
