Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
