I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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