when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Randomize
