Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
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