I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
