ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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