Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
