in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Randomize
