I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Randomize
