youre lurking in front of me
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
