I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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