a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
