some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
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