Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I made him laugh his dick is mine
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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