chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
