Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
