The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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