Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize