I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
