we're making bets on your personal life
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I think your dad took our porno
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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