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mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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