Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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