just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
