I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
